A famous lawyer found himself at heaven's gates confronting St. Peter. He protested that it was all a mistake -- he was only 49 and far too young to be dead. "That's odd," said St. Peter, "according to the hours you've billed you're 119 years old.
Client: Excuse me, do you have a moment? If I pay you $150, will you answer three questions for me? Lawyers: Yes. Yes. Now then, what is your third question?